To the stressed mom

The other day, we were at the playground, my boy usually swings for a long time, while saying “Super High!” — his latest joy.

An older boy came running and grabbed the empty swing next to us, he said “mommy, I wanna swing” pushing the swing over his head and running underneath it. He was getting close to the back of my boy’s swing, and so I said – please be careful – fearing he may get hit.

His mom rushed in, yelling full-on: “I told you not to do that! I told you to listen to me! Look at me…!” — Picking the boy up and placing him on the swing, she continued to yell in his face as he was trying to point out something — “Here! Look at me! Look at me! I told you! Look at me now…!” — Finally the boy broke down crying.

As she pushed the swing, she was staring at her phone, the boy was now bawling and she continued to yell “I just about had it with you… knock it off, stop it, you better knock it off now.”

I felt terrible

She seemed so angry and unhappy, and her boy was on the receiving end of her emotions. — I asked my boy if he wanted to go play on the slides, “more Super High!” he replied.

Unfortunately, the yelling continued for a while, so I finally turned to her and asked “can you please stop yelling?” She looked at me in disbelief and said “it is my boy!” I replied “yes but you are affecting everyone here” she grabbed her boy saying “let’s go to another playground, I am being criticized for my parenting.” 

My boy looked at me with puzzled eyes, and I said to him, “that boy was very sad because his mommy was yelling, she is probably not feeling well and is having a rough day.” — This brief explanation seemed to have appeased my boy from the sad event we had just witnessed.

I wanted to say something else to the mother yelling at her kid in the playground. Somehow help to comfort her, to let her know that I understand.

I am a mom too

I promise that I am not judging. I understand that you are probably having a rough day and I am sorry. What your kid did was really nothing, all he wanted to do is swing.

I know you are probably trying to protect him, and to teach him there may be accidental consequences to his actions, all the while keeping your own sanity. Believe me, I understand. — I am a mom too.

Being a mom is not easy, you have to be ON all the time and you cannot disconnect, you have to monitor your kid — aside from monitoring yourself, and know that wherever you are in your mind, and in your heart, can affect those around you.

Our kids depend on us, they look up to us for encouragement, comfort, approval, and support.

Yet, they are kids

They are discovering what it’s like to be human, exploring the world around them, and figuring out life as they go.

Just like you and me

Moms are not perfect either, we can feel overwhelmed, frustrated, and perhaps unhappy at times, all the while being challenged by our restless explorers.

Everyone is bound to have a bad day, we can lose patience and yell. — I have yelled at my kid before. I am not proud of admitting to losing my cool, yet I am aware of myself, and I keep checking on how and where I am, can affect him.

After witnessing this event, I am able to see my boy with more compassion and yet more patience. After all, he is just a kid, and I am a mom too.

❥ Namaste

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